all you need is love
just when all the loneliness that built up during state college has started to go away, i’ve got to leave my family again and go to virginia. sometimes i wish that my family and my life at home weren’t so good because then maybe it would be easier for me to be independent and move on with my life. instead, i just want to stay here forever, at this age, in this place, with these people.
in some ways, i envy my cousins who are not very close to their parents, or each other. they travel and got to school all across the country (one in another country, even.) but i don’t think that that is really worth it. i know experiences are a good thing and traveling is a good thing but i wouldn’t trade my relationships with my parents or siblings for anything in the world.
all you need is love.
for what it’s worth, i know virginia will be a good thing for me. i love going down there to visit my aunt. her and i get along really well and we are a lot alike. there is a lot to do down there, and i know with working every day and then going to the barn with barb occasionally, time will pass by quickly. i can come home once a month and my parents will come down to see me, and maybe some of my friends too…. if they can find the time? it’s not like i’ve been doomed to hell or anything, and i realize that this might all seem very over exaggerated, and maybe it is …. but it’s how i feel. i’ll just look at it like this — i got through 9 months in state college, i can absolutely get through 2 months in virginia. ”be positive!” is going to be my thought from here on out.
